“You can be safe or you can be brave, but you can’t be both.” Little did I know at the time that this pithy phrase would become synonymous with major change in my chaotic existence. Having returned to the mainland after six years of serving at American embassies overseas, I found myself in a “desert purgatory” far from the international limelight. El Paso, Texas in the mid-80’s was definitely an exile destination, albeit my request to Headquarters to be transferred to a “warm dry place” due to my son’s chronic asthma condition. But the location could not extinguish the fire to continue delving in covert operations; all that was needed was adapting to my surroundings while maintaining my informant cache in order to infiltrate drug organizations elsewhere.

Nonetheless, my boss had other plans, given he realized the time had come to transition back to the “real world.” Twelve years of “being someone else” had taken its toll and he felt responsible to bring me back. Thus, he asked me to address a group of Army officers at Fort Bliss on a Monday morning regarding the international drug scene. I was completely horrified at his request; going public, despite the controlled environment, was hazardous at best. Begrudgingly, to say the least, I met with about 20 military leaders and addressed them for about 30 minutes, my first venture into public speaking, which in turn became a lifetime adventure. 

I was somewhat surprised at their reaction to my presentation. They commented that similar lectures were scheduled for Tuesday and Wednesday with additional officers, and they urged me to return and address the remaining two groups myself for they felt my message was extremely impactful. To this day I do not understand the seismic shift that occurred that afternoon, except to say I returned the next two days and never looked back; a complete pendulum swing occurred as my life went from deeply covert to quite overt in a matter of months. And the introductory phrase to those first three speeches continues to be my favorite headliner to this day….”You can be safe or you can be brave, but you can’t be both.”

Exposure and reward

Was I being brave, intrepid, fearless or just plain stupid? What my superior meant as a very gradual transition quickly went astray. Weeks later he learned that I eventually spoke to the Rotary, the Lions Club and a PTA group without his knowledge, which concerned him greatly. But the Pandora’s box was now open; and with it the realization that “coming out” so quickly was as menacing, or more, than staying in a little longer. Due only to God’s grace was I spared dreadful consequences for my actions, and in return I learned lots about risk management. If there was inherent peril in undercover work, there was more in surfacing without a proper plan. 

Today I find myself surrounded by risk takers. Many of my Christian brothers have become successful businessmen and entrepreneurs and their stories of success and failure, high and lows, exuberance and anguish are of great interest to me. In fact, it is their times of adversity that most interest me, for it is during the harshest moments that a man’s mettle shines brightest. What fascinates me about these brothers is how they continue to “ride the waves” while most settle for flatlining. Considered “guarded risk taking” by some, they continue to thrive despite the consequences and understand the “price of doing business.”  Exposure and reward go hand in hand; no pain/no gain; in essence, risk seems much more hazardous to us who seek tranquility, while occasional hazards is business as usual to them.

Are you playing it safe or being brave?

When it comes to our Christian walk, are we playing it safe or are we being brave? Can we withstand the turbulent waves of a secular world, or do we search for stability? In my estimation, the real Christian walk is an uplifting but treacherous journey not apt for the weak of heart. Those choosing it must have a clear understanding of its unsafe environment. And the Lord, in his infinite mercy, provides us specific guidelines to traverse it as illustrated both in Scripture and in literature. 

In “The Pilgrim’s Progress,” a religious allegory written by Paul Bunyan in the latter 1600’s, an everyday figure aptly named Christian travels from his home in the City of Destruction to the Celestial City. Along the way he encounters numerous obstacles such as Hill Difficulty and the Valley of Humiliation, passes the Valley of the Shadow of Death, battles the monster Apollyon, is arrested by Lord Hate-good, stumbles onto the grounds of Doubting Castle, and makes the mistake of following the flatterer until the Shining One rescues him and leads him to the Celestial City. 

Sound familiar? This imaginary journey began with our ancestors being evicted from Eden and will end with eternal life in The New Jerusalem; what lies in between this very day are our present lives, where we routinely have to “strap our boots” to battle the evil one, and where courage and faith are a necessary staple. And our marching orders are those given to Joshua by Jehovah; “Haven’t I commanded you: be strong and courageous? Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

A win win situation

It seems to me that the church today (me and you) is very active in gauging risk tolerance rather than to tolerate and embrace the “risk” of truly following Jesus Christ. Tolerance was at the heart of the lukewarm church of Laodicea that Christ spat out of his mouth, the kind of church that today preaches varied roads to salvation, refuses to instruct about the existence and condition of hell and that concentrates on the wellbeing of the body over the soul. Many Christians who feel comfortable doing commerce in perilous environments are unwilling to take a step of faith in carrying out God’s business. So, could it be possible to merge compromise and accommodation by amending our initial premise? What about if we can be both brave and safe? Psalm 27:1 reminds us that the Lord is the stronghold of our lives and that he dissipates our fears while Psalm 4:8 prompts us to sleep in peace for the Lord alone can make us dwell in safety. Yes, we are more than capable of doing both; being brave knowing He has our back while safely resting in His loving arms, for in the end He works out all things for those that love Him. That, our brothers and sisters, is complete coverage… our spiritual safety net.

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