Men

How I Found Healing in a Hog Pen

Entrepreneur, marketing director, video producer and corporate president, this is only a partial list of my supposedly impressive credentials. Now, let me take off my mask. Without that mask I was a self centered, prideful alcoholic and drug addict. I was bound by all of the above for 31 long years. I have been in jail 16 times for alcohol or drug related offenses, twice divorced, went through three inpatient recovery programs and three suicide attempts. The last attempt I ingested 60 valiums in an alcoholic blackout. Yes that was the real me. Notice I said the past tense “was” […]

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Adventures in Singlehood

As we exit the Christmas season of parties and family gatherings and enter the Valentine’s Day season of love and romance, many of us have wondered where we fit in. Some of us feel an emptiness, a chasm in our hearts that we believe should be filled by a spouse. While some love the freedom of being single, others feel lonely and even angry at God that he has left them alone. Others, search the Bible for solace in Paul’s point that it is better to be single than married (1 Corinthians 7: 8-9). Like most Americans, single or married, […]

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Allen West: Do Something Outside Your Comfort Zone

Having served in the U.S. Congress and as a Lieutenant Colonel in the United States Army, Allen West does not shrink back from a fight.  “We live in the greatest nation on the earth, and we need to remember how great this nation is,” he said. Addressing more than 150 business leaders during a Christian Business Men’s Connection luncheon on December 18, West challenged the audience to “listen for that small voice that is asking you to do something outside your comfort zone, and remember Ephesians 10 that calls you to be strong in the Lord and in His mighty […]

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Cultivating Hope in the Midst of Depression

As Christians we are told at Christmas that this should be the happiest time of the year — a time of joy with grateful family, colleagues and friends. Yet, for some of us this is sadly not the case. In my work with Christians in a private practice and then in my ministry I began to see that the Holidays can be a significant increase in depression. One North American survey reported that 45% of respondents dreaded the festive season. One very blue Christmas I reflect back on one Christmas that was filled with depression, sadness and feeling very isolated […]

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Holiday Blues

For some of us Christmas represents one of the most heart-wrenching times of year. As it approaches there is often impending feeling of dread. The lights and jolly songs that fill the streets only increase the ache that reverberates in our hearts. Whether it is the death of a loved one, the end of a marriage, difficult childhood memories, complicated family relationships, empty nest, loneliness or anything else, Christmas can bring on an overwhelming sense of sadness. The fact that the marketing world capitalizes on Christmas plays a big part in the anguish that some experience. Everything being perfectly presented, […]

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Six Pillars of Parenting for Fathers

The first Father’s Day in the United States was observed on June 19, 1910, in Spokane, Washington. The day was proposed by Mrs. John B. Dodd, who wanted to honor her father, William Smart, a Civil War veteran who raised six children alone after his wife died in childbirth. Clearly, Mrs. Dodd took seriously the Lord’s instruction, set forth in the fifth commandment, to honor your father.  I understand that not all of us have a father like William Smart, who seemed worthy of honor. But the commandment does not tell us to honor our father if he is honorable; […]

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Why Is It So Hard To Admit I Make Mistakes?

The following question came up on my radio program, Ask the Counselor. Q: “I have been telling myself for months now that “I had to” do something very radical in order to survive a very difficult time. Most of my trusted friends, family and counselors disagreed with my action. I felt very frustrated. Why could they not see that I had no choice and that this was the best possible solution to a bad situation? Why did they have to judge me? I was100 percent sure I did the only possible thing I could do. In the last few days […]

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“Get Better” Doesn’t Work

In a New York Times op-ed, Oliver Burkeman suggests something counter-intuitive, but obvious: the more you force someone to have fun, the less fun they’ll have. His piece is called “Who Goes to Work to Have Fun,” and the money quote is this one: “Psychologists have shown that positive-thinking affirmations make people with low self-esteem feel worse; that patients with panic disorders can become more anxious when they try to relax; and that an ability to experience negative emotions, rather than struggling to exclude them, is crucial for mental health. And these are just the hazards of trying to enforce happiness […]

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Father’s Day Gifts Your Dad Actually Wants

Father’s Day is just around the corner, and we all struggle with trying to find the right gift for dad. The tie is too cliché, so what should you get him instead? The real challenge is finding a gift that your father will enjoy and actually use, so here we have a list of items that the patriarch of your household probably already wants. Keep in mind that no two fathers are exactly the same, so not everything on this list will be right for everyone. Read through, use your judgment and find what your dad is really is really […]

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Your Brain On XXX

Pornography has been around for a long time. However, now with the coming of the Internet it is becoming epidemic in scope. It is no respecter of gender, age or any other socio-economic demographic. It is free, private and easily available in unlimited variety. Some people see no problem with pornography. Others think it is just a matter of moral or spiritual differences in people. This article will look at pornography from the physiological, neurological and relational perspective; what you could call the practical problems of pornography. Brain neurochemistry and pornography The human brain operates on chemicals and electricity to […]

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